SISTERS' SANCTUARY

Lacey Loves

2008-09-13T02:14:00.000-04:00

-clothes dried in the sunshine

-knowing that my physical, emotional and spirtual needs are worthy of being met

-the art of clarity (getting rid of vaguness)

-recyclying

Self-Love Day Activity

2008-09-13T02:11:00.000-04:00

Self-Love Day Activity:

What fears have been holding you back?

What judgements and toxic beliefs do you carry?

What can you do to add pure love to the situation or thought ?

Commit to doing that thing today. Right now!

Happy Self-Love Day

2008-09-13T02:05:00.001-04:00

Greeting Beautiful People!

Will you turn your Divine Spark into a flame on this Self-love love day? In this life time?

The Divine Spark

n Divine Humanity believes that each and every person has an immortal ʽsparkʼ within them. This is oursacred self.

n This starlight that we have within us needs to be awaken, to grow and to be brought to the surface and nourished until its radiance suffuses the world.

n In so doing our relationship to ourselves and to all other things of the world is transformed from being based on fear to being based on love.

New Consciousness

n Life is not about ʽsinʼ or ʽguilt.ʼ

n Life is about Awakening.

n Awakening to a new consciousness that the divine is in all things, all things have consciousness and that we are divine human beings born in love and in goodness.

n This transformation of consciousness from a sinful human being to a divine human being is essential for the well-being of humanity and the earth.

Rev. Dr. JC Husfelt and Rev. Sherry Husfelt

of http://www.divinehumanity.com

This Self-love Day let us celebrate and ignite our Divine Sparks and inspire our youth to do the same.

Happy Self-love Day Beautiful People!

Lacey!

Personal Empowerment Coach

Sisters' Sanctuary

Video Pick of the Month - Zora Howard - Biracial Hair

2008-08-24T11:39:00.001-04:00

Sisters' Sanctuary Sponsored Event

2008-08-23T18:19:00.002-04:00

Philly Stand UP! in LA! 215 LA!

Calling ALL PHILADELPHIANS!!!
It has been a long time coming and now we have arrived. We all came from the City of Brotherly Love to the City of Angels for one reason or another. Some of our original focuses have shifted to other goals and some of us are on the same path. It is time for us all to meet and create an epicenter of Family and Community of Philadelphians.

WE WELCOME YOU TO 215LA!

Faruq Jenkins, Lacey C. Clark! of (www.sisterssanctuary.com) & Nana
Location: The House of Nana
11445 Stagg Street, North Hollywood, CA 91605-2620 US

When: Saturday, September 13, 2:00PM
Phone: 323-445-2565

Our mission is to pool all of our resources to support each others endeavors, artistic and otherwise, by developing a collective network of togetherness in an effort to help the visions of its members manifest into a reality.

Are you teaching a class?

Fundraising for a project?

Performing Live?

Do you need a babysitter?

Do you need a ride to the airport?

Fun stuff too...Bowling Night, Pot Luck Dinners, and Basketball Games when the 76ers are in town! Possibilities are endless. LET US COMMUNE!!!

Please spread the word to all Philly people in your circle and beyond by forwarding this invite.

Happy Sisters' Sanctuary Self-Love Day

2008-08-13T00:48:00.002-04:00

Hello Beautiful People!
How are you? Happy Sisters' Sanctuary Self-love Day!
I wanted to share this message of personal empowerment for this month's self-love day! Enjoy!

Be Proactive:

We’re all born dependent and experience years of solid effort at getting us to do what others want us to do. Most still carry a mental map which puts them below the powerful and truly capable “other people” of our real or =0 A fantasy lives. The habits of self-acceptance and listening to our internal drummers are hard to develop, but critical for full living. Self-confidence is where it all starts. It’s not an “act”— but it is a “decision” which one can make and struggle to live with. Self-confidence comes from experience at taking risks to try things out, and giving yourself some credit for doing so.Self-confidence comes from abolishing guilt, putting fear on the shelf, and telling yourself every moment of your life that you are o.k. It comes from habits of listening to, and going with, one’s heart and desire, rather than being 0D cowed by the fears which one can always apply to circumstances. When things could go either way, Winners get in the habit of describing the glass as ‘half full’ rather than ‘half empty’.

Steve Iman

excerpt from: Personal Growth

http://www.csupomona.edu/~sciman/steve/articles/essaysonggowth.pdf

Here's to truly accepting and honoring you and inspiring our youth to do the same!
Happy Self-Love Day Beautiful People!

Lacey!
Personal Empowerment Coach/Founder
Sisters' Sanctuary

Self - Love Activity

2008-08-13T00:47:00.000-04:00

Practice developing your intuition. We have all have it. Sit in quiet without t.v. radio or computer.
Ask a question, take deep breaths and listen for the answer. Repeat until the answer feels right in your spirit or center of peace.

Lacey! Loves

2008-08-13T00:43:00.000-04:00

Lacey! Loves:

-Trees...the varied shapes and sizes.

-Salmon pate' and caviar on an omelet.

-Making Friends

-DA (Debtors Anonymous) (Please do a google search)

-Cashing checks

-Avocado

-People who ask, "How are you doing?" and really care to hear the true answer.

Word from The Youth

2008-08-06T00:10:00.000-04:00

Tell us the truth, and give us room to live! We want advice, and what better guidance to give then from true experiences from our parents, who we hope have our greatest interest at heart.

Anjanae DeCoursey

Imhotep Charter High School

01/09/07

Sisters' Worth Celebrating - July 2008 - The Black Women's Art Festival

2008-07-30T09:35:00.000-04:00

The Black Women’s Arts Festival (BWAF) was founded and produced in March 2003 by Founder and Former Director Cassendre Xavier. Xavier produced a 3-day event, which showcased the work of black women artists in: performance, visual arts, literary arts, and film. Now in its fifth year BWAF has become a non-profit which produces a once-yearly 4-day festival which showcases: Music/Live Performance, Literary Arts, Visual Arts, Film/Video, Workshops, and Dance/Theater and hosts over 60 artists from across the globe. BWAF is committed to being a platform that values black women and their work; emphasizing unique, under-represented art forms, showcasing new and emerging artists while promoting the necessity of health and well-being. Led by Creative Director Monica McIntyre, BWAF is poised to become a world-renowned arts festival. Sisters' Sanctuary was able to have a brief Q & A with BWAF Creative Director, Monica McIntyre.

What is BWAF?

BWAF is the Black Women's Arts Festival, an annual festival and non-profit organization. It's a Philadelphia based community event which focuses on the visibility and viability of black women artists of all genres and media without regard for: age, gender expression, physical ability, religion, sexual orientation or size. BWAF is a 501(c)3 organization.

When was BWAF started? Who are the founders of BWAF?

The Black Women's Arts Festival was founded in March 2003 by Cassendre Xavier and began as a 3-day one-time event.

Where is BWAF located?

Our festival, as of BWAF 2007, takes place in multiple locations. Our venues for this year are: First Unitarian Church, The Rotunda, Kaffa Crossing, Vivant Art Collection, The Metropolitan Bakery & Cafe, Sanctuary, and World Cafe Live.

Why was BWAF started?

Cassendre Xavier created the Black Women's Arts Festival in response to a lack of visible and viable black female artists; she knew they existed and made an opportunity to feature their talent.

Why are you apart of BWAF?

I first became involved with the Black Women's Arts Festival in 2003 as a performer and recognized the beauty and inspiration that this event gave me. I just knew this event had to keep happening and was given the opportunity to curate it in 2004 and have since been heavily involved in its organizing and production. This is such an important and necessary event for our community and the world at large and I am compelled to stay involved.

What is the membership of BWAF made up of? (For example, type of people, their location, etc.)

At present the Black Women's Arts Festival doesn't have membership.

Do BWAF have any upcoming events? Tell us about this event? (for example, purpose, location, date, time, price, etc.)

We are preparing for our 5th Annual Black Women's Arts Festival happening July 31st-August 3rd, 2008 in Philadelphia, PA. For more information, complete schedule, pricing, and discounted tickets go to: www.bwafphilly.org or call 215.951.0330 ext 2108.

Tell us about the past participates?

We have been blessed to have some amazing performers grace the Black Women's Arts Festival. Our past years have featured: Sparlha Swa, RhapsodE, Davina Stewart, Walidha Imarisha, Olu Butterfly, Ryva Parker, and Voice of Africa, to name a few.

How does this event encourage teen girls? How does BWAF look to affect the lives of teen girls?

By honoring black women artists we send a positive message to young women about their importance as people, females, and artists. Seeing the wide range of talent that is presented by our festival: dance, theater, visual arts, literary arts, films, and workshops; helps to expand their perceptions of what women can and are able to do.

Photos In Order of Appearances: Creative Director, Monica McIntrye; Founder, Cassendre Xavier; 2007 Featured Artist, Keisha Hutchins; 2007 Featured Artist, Nedra Johnson; 2004,2005 & 2007 Featured Artist, Marcia McIntyre; 2003 & 2005 Featured Artist, GHETTOSONGBIRD; 2007 Featured Artist, Sparlha Swa.

Video Pick of the Month

2008-07-24T02:30:00.004-04:00

This video is dedicated to all the sisters who are in pain. Unresolved hurt in girlhood evolves into more unresolved pain in womanhood. Please know that healing, peace and beauty is possible.
I love you.

Lacey!

Happy SELF-LOVE DAY BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!

2008-07-13T15:39:00.003-04:00

Greeting Beautiful PEOPLE!
Happy JULY Sisters' Sanctuary SELF-LOVE DAY!

I wanted to share some inspirational nuggets that will carry you through the month. Please share with as many people as you can!

"Lack of self-worth is the fundamental source of all emotional pain. A feeling of insecurity, unworthiness and lack of value is the core experience of powerlessness."~ Gary Zukav & Linda Francis - from "The Heart Of The Soul" ~

Self-love is priceless!
Be inspired to create healthy models for our youth.
Model self-love!

Happy Self-love Day Beautiful People!
Lacey !
Personal Empowerment Coach and Founder
Sisters' Sanctuary

Sel-Love Day ACTIVITY!

2008-07-13T15:33:00.003-04:00

Refer 5-10 people to this blog to watch the posted video and discuss the relevance of the posted quote.

Lacey Loooves:

2008-07-13T15:06:00.006-04:00

The design and the summer events at the Ford Ampitheater in Los Angeles.

The grounds, gardens and view of the hill and mountains from the Getty Museum.

Mya aka “My-My” the medium burnt orange colored dog because she is so sweet.

A freshly laundered, big, fluffy and white comforter because it makes me feel like I am wrapped in a soft cloud.

Trader Joes! Because they have inexpensive, high quality, and gourmet health food.

Creating and being part of community because it reminds me that people need each other for support, understanding and love. Isolation is a dream killer.

The Spa Soiree presented by VIBE HOLISTIC. Free high quality spa services… (I got the Rain Drop Therapy and reflexology )and a free buffet of health food with coconut water and cashew juice. YUM! It was delectable! Loved every second of it! Another one is coming up in Sept in LA and in 09 in NY.

What do you looooove?

Word From Our Youth

2008-07-06T10:43:00.002-04:00

Does abuse equal love? If it doesn’t comments like “I’m beating you because I love you” imply that. Personally I’m not a supporter of beatings.

Anjanae DeCoursey

Imhotep Charter High School

01/09/07

Earth & Women Documentary

2008-06-30T02:11:00.001-04:00

New Vision was Associate Producer and Director of Photography. This project ended up being the pilot for a series about caring for Mother Earth & Nature by utilizing Sustainable Living. Producer, Lyndol Michael - Differentia Films www.media-theater.com and it was picked up by a distributor in USA.

Statement of Black Men Against the Exploitation of Black Women

2008-06-21T04:00:00.000-04:00

*Statement of Black Men Against the Exploitation of Black Women*

Six years have gone by since we first heard the allegations that R. Kelly had filmed himself having sex with an underage girl. During that time we have seen the videotape being hawked on street corners in Black communities, as if the dehumanization of one of our own was not at stake. We have seen entertainers rally around him and watched his career reach new heights despite the grave possibility that he had molested and urinated on a 13-year old girl. We saw African Americans purchase millions of his records despite the long history of such charges swirling around the singer. Worst of all, we have witnessed the sad vision of Black people cheering his acquittal with a fervor usually reserved for community heroes and shaken our heads at the stunning lack of outrage over the verdict in the broader Black community.

Over these years, justice has been delayed and it has been denied. Perhaps a jury can accept R. Kelly's absurd defense and find "reasonable doubt" despite the fact that the film was shot in his home and featured a man who was identical to him. Perhaps they doubted that the young woman in the courtroom was, in fact, the same person featured in the ten year old video. But there is no doubt about this: some young Black woman was filmed being degraded and exploited by a much older Black man, some daughter of our community was left unprotected, and somewhere another Black woman is being molested, abused or raped and our callous handling of this case will make it that much more difficult for her to come forward and be believed. And each of us is responsible for it.

We have proudly seen the community take to the streets in defense of Black men who have been the victims of police violence or racist attacks, but that righteous outrage only highlights the silence surrounding this verdict.

We believe that our judgment has been clouded by celebrity-worship; we believe that we are a community in crisis and that our addiction to sexism has reached such an extreme that many of us cannot even recognize child molestation when we see it.

We recognize the absolute necessity for Black men to speak in a single, unified voice and state something that should be absolutely obvious: that the women of our community are full human beings, that we cannot and will not tolerate the poisonous hatred of women that has already damaged our families, relationships and culture.

We believe that our daughters are precious and they deserve our protection. We believe that Black men must take responsibility for our contributions to this terrible state of affairs and make an effort to change our lives and our communities.

This is about more than R. Kelly's claims to innocence. *It is about our survival as a community*. Until we believe that our daughters, sisters, mothers, wives and friends are worthy of justice, until we believe that rape, domestic violence and the casual sexism that permeates our culture are absolutely unacceptable, until we recognize that the first priority of any community is the protection of its young, we will remain in this tragic dead-end.

We ask that you:

o Sign your name if you are a Black male who supports this statement:

http://www.petitiononline.com/rkelly/petition.html

o Forward this statement to your entire network and ask other Black males to sign as well

o Make a personal pledge to never support R. Kelly again in any form or fashion, unless he publicly apologizes for his behavior and gets help for his long-standing sexual conduct, in his private life and in his music

o Make a commitment in your own life to never to hit, beat, molest, rape, or exploit Black females in any way and, if you have, to take ownership for your behavior, seek emotional and spiritual help, and, over time, become a voice against all forms of Black female exploitation

o Challenge other Black males, no matter their age, class or educational background, or status in life, if they engage in behavior and language that is exploitative and or disrespectful to Black females in any way. If you say nothing, you become just as guilty.

o Learn to listen to the voices, concerns, needs, criticisms, and challenges of Black females, because they are our equals, and because in listening we will learn a new and different kind of Black manhood

We support the work of scholars, activists and organizations that are helping to redefine Black manhood in healthy ways. Additional resources are listed below.

Books:
Who's Gonna Take the Weight, Kevin Powell
New Black Man, Mark Anthony Neal
Deals with the Devil and Other Reasons to Riot, Pearl Cleage
Traps: African American Men on Gender and Sexuality, Rudolph Byrd and Beverly Guy-Sheftall

Films:
I Am A Man: Black Masculinity in America, by Byron Hurt
Hip Hop: Beyond Beats and Rhymes, by Byron Hurt
NO! The Rape Documentary, by Aishah Simmons

Organizations
The 2025 Campaign: www.2025bmb.org <http://www.2025bmb.org>
Men Stopping Violence: www.menstoppingviolence.org <http://www.menstoppingviolence.org>

Happy Self-Love Day Activity !

2008-06-13T12:22:00.000-04:00

Take a few moments to ask yourself what the Self-Love Day message mean to you.

What does it mean to you?

I invite you to leave a comment so we can all share in the reflection.

Peace and Greatness,
Lacey C. Clark!

HAPPY SELF-LOVE DAY BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!

2008-06-13T12:07:00.002-04:00

Greeting Beautiful People!

Happy June Self -Love Day! YEAAAAAAAAH!
I came across this quote...it vibrated with my spirit and I wanted to share it with you as the theme of this month's Self-love Day:

"Hearts are blocked by attachment. The heart is a radiant energy and we block it from flowing out. If we let if flow peace, love and joy would become real. " -Sian

Here's to being in the DIVINE flow with our cups overflowing with peace, love and joy and inspiring our youth to do the same.

Happy Self-love Day Beautiful People!
Lacey!
Personal Empowerment/ Self Esteem Coach!
Founder
Sisters' Sanctuary

Temple Sanctuary by Monisha Garner of Moya Body Care

2008-06-13T09:37:00.008-04:00

Apply a light Yoga and Breathing routine in the morning before you start your day. You will have increased blood circulation and oxygen throughout the body which enhances skin tone, keeps eyes bright and clear and promotes a healthy mental outlook.

Moya Body Care is about returning back to our natural state, becoming centered beings and maintaining a balance between a healthy lifestyle and genuine wellness. Our mission is to assist in creating a wholistic approach in attaining greatness in life. We offer a combination of Colon Hydrotherapy, Massage Therapy, Yoga and Organic Body Care as well as individualized Wellness Coaching that is designed to empower and move you to take action.

Website Link: www.moyabodycare.com
Email: monisha_garner@yahoo.com

Lacey! Loooooooves:

2008-06-13T07:45:00.009-04:00

Hanging out with Monique and Z(he's so beautiful, he's only 1.5 years), Monisha and Ksands. Monique, Z and I went to a non denominational church and during one of the musical selections, I was overwhelmed with joy and vulnerability that I began to cry. As soon as the tears fell he began to rub me in comfort. The DIVINE speaks through the youth. Are we listening? I just met Z(two weeks ago)... but he is so intuitive. He was 95 percent quiet the whole service..imagine that.

Kiting on the beach at sunset.

Jumping and laughing uncontrollably in a bounce house (the kind at amusement parks).

My friend, "Beats".

The time spent with Michael in Long Beach,CA...so effortless and beautiful! Thank you.

Grilled fish.

Leslie Odom - because he exudes grace, greatness and an artistic brilliance and I am filled to the brim in his presence. Here is Leslie singing, Try a Little Tenderness.

What do you looooooOOve?

Word From Our Youth

2008-06-06T05:18:00.001-04:00

Name calling is disrespectful, words like “ho”, “bitch”, and “slut” hurt us. Approach us with encouraging words like, “beautiful”, “smart”, and “sacred” when talking to us. To find out more ways to handle difficult situations see “Celebrate HER Now!” An Interactive Guide to Loving Ourselves and Embracing Female Youth of The Hip-Hop Generation, By Lacey C. Clark!

Anjanae DeCoursey

Imhotep Charter High School

01/09/07

Video of the Month - "A Powerful Noise"

2008-05-30T18:40:00.002-04:00

An official selection of the 2008 Tribeca Film Festival, this inspiring documentary follows three extraordinary women -- in Bosnia-Herzegovina, Mali and Vietnam -- as they overcome barriers to lead day-to-day battles against ignorance, poverty, oppression, and ethnic strife. Visit www.apowerfulnoise.org to learn more.

Executive Producer Sheila Johnson talks about "A Powerful Noise" on Fox Business News.

At the Tribeca Film Festival in New York, viewers discuss the new documentary "A Powerful Noise."

Sister's Worth Celebrating - May 2008

2008-05-24T10:49:00.020-04:00

Good Day Everyone,

I am your blog manager, Shanny. I will be formally introducing myself later this month.

This month in Sister's Worth Celebrating, I could not settle on one Sister. So, I am going to talk about a few and I want you all to share your thoughts. I also want you all to tell us about a Sister or Sisters you think are worth celebrating. The Sisters I have chosen are Mary McLeod Bethune, Mary Mahoney, The Square Rootz, Priscilla Maddox & Joan Reid.

Mary McLeod Bethune was African-American teacher who, with only $1.50, began a school to help educate young African-American women. Sister Mary McLeod Bethune has inspired all of us to sisterhood and protecting our younger sisters. She also has shown us it does not take alot to start. I feel Sister Bethune's spirit throughout Sisters' Sanctuary, which is why I am a supporter. I am confident Sister Bethune would too.

Mary Mahoney was the first African American woman to study and work as a professionally trained nurse. Mahoney received her diploma from the New England Hospital in 1879, one of only four of 18 to pass the difficult course. So to all of those who are nurses and aspiring nurses, this is one of the Sister that paved they way for you. If you have a young lady that has shown interest in nursing make sure she knows who this woman is.

These next Sisters are a personal inspiration to me. I say personal, because they are running the type of business I am building at the moment. When I started researching Kitchen Co-ops, I found there were none in my area. I widen my area search and found an article entitled, 'Can’t Stand the Heat? Then Rent the Kitchen' by Joseph P. Fried from the New York Times. In his articles, he spotlights Priscilla Maddox & Joan Reid, the owners of Kitchen For Hire in Brooklyn. I was inspired by how these ladies well into retirement, decided to venture out onto something new. They shared a lot of information that helped me with what I needed to know about my business venture. I have recently had the opportunity to reach out to them an learn more. I celebrate these Sisters because they were not afraid to try and fail. We need to encourage ourselves, each other and our younger Sisters NOT TO BE AFRAID TO TRY AND FAIL.

Last, but not least The Square Rootz. I had the pleasure of interviewing these Sisters for my magazine. These young vibrate ladies bring color and inspiration to their movement. The present members are New Yorker native Kat Noel, Brooklyn born Boston raise Philly transplant Marly Pierre-Louis and West Coast native Brooklyn transplant Jessica Jones. The have dubbed themselves the official street beaters. These Sisters aim to bring the African Diaspora together through event and media. These Sisters are also very active in their communities. The Square Rootz have formed to be another artery in the positive push for our young Sisters.

These Sisters have made a great impression on my life past, present and future. I only hope to be able to repay them, by making them same sort of impression in other Sisters' lives and paying my represents to them whenever I have the chance. In the upcoming months, I will be presenting more in depth spotlights on these women. Come back and learn more and be inspired more.

Mary McLeod Bethune
Mary Eliza Mahoney, R.N.
Kitchen For Hire
The Square Rootz

Who is the Sister You Celebrate? What does she do? Where is she from? When did you start to celebrate her? Why do you celebrate her? How do you celebrate her inspiration in your daily life?

Shanny aka Shanise B. is the creator/owner of The Akua Projects & Designs By ASH. She is a Philadelphia native and a life long activist for Sisterhood within the African Diaspora. Shanny became a supporter of Sisters' Sanctuary in 2006 and an active part of Sisters' Sanctuary in 2007. Shanny is a lover of creation and creative people. Shanny aspires to open her first brick and mortar business in 2009.

Self-love Day Activity:

2008-05-13T10:58:00.004-04:00

Examine the quality of your relationships. Is there an ebb and flow? Do you give as well as receive? Is there balance? Ask yourself, is this relationship based on love or fear? If it is based on fear, how can I give more love to myself to attract a more love-centered relationship in my life?

Lacey LooooOoOOOooves:

2008-05-13T10:32:00.005-04:00

-Celebrating Mother's Day with her legendary motha!

-Learning tennis from a lil' fabulous 8 year African-American girl...potential to be the next Venus and Serena!

-Being in the DIVINE flow.

-Hanging out with people who enjoy, celebrate and honor life without drugs or alcohol.

-Somewhere Here on Earth- New Release by Prince.

-Agave-sweetener from a cactus plant that taste like a light version of honey and maple syrup.

-Watercolors XM Radio- Art for your Ears! YES! YES!

-Sadiki! Sadiki! Sadiki!

-Her Artsy Friends.

Belonging is HUMAN Need!

2008-05-13T10:12:00.007-04:00

Happy Self-Love Day Beautiful People!

I received this message via email and I wanted to share this message as the theme of this month's Self-Love Day! The author of this article is unknown.

Relationships: Longing for Belonging

FROM THE WORD:

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." - l Corinthians 13:4-8

The question arises, "What is it that really makes people happy?" The answer is: Quality Relationships. The reason why I know this to be true is that so many people run from relationship to relationship looking for the elusive components of a good friendship or the ideal husband or wife. We are born with an insatiable inner need for meaningful interaction with others. The following information will help you to understand and deal with difficult people and personalities.

Take men and women for example. Men are more interested in feeling that they are capable to perform a task or a duty. Women are more interested in acceptance. What we look for in relationships, and what every one needs to experience is:

Feeling Accepted
Feeling Celebrated
Feeling Connected
Feeling Understood
Feeling Wanted and Needed
Feeling Appreciated
Feeling Enjoyed
Feeling Significant

When those elements of "feelings" are not present, we feel as if we do not belong. Then our love languages may be different from the people with whom we are trying to connect. If people are not communicating in our love language, this can cause isolation and an intense feeling of aloneness.

According to Gary Chapman in his book entitled , The Five Love Languages, they are:

Words of Affirmation
Quality Time
Receiving Gifts
Acts of Services
Physical Touch

The first thing you have to work on is your integrity, pulling all the parts of you together and embracing yourself as a total person. This involves accepting your personality, disposition, uniqueness, your past and your present. You will never have true intimacy until you are truly intimate with yourself.

GET TO KNOW THE REAL YOU

Take the masks off and explore everything you have suppressed over the course of your life. Accept and move toward resolving unresolved issues and healing any residue of past pain and disappointments.

Remember every relationship, in a sense, gives you another chance to resolve issues you didn't get squared away in a previous one. But if you do not heal your hurts, you'll never get them squared away. You'll just continue to repeat relational problems and replay your pain again and again. And when this pattern develops you'll have created a much bigger problem. You will no longer relate to people, but only to what they represent. They will not be anyone you will share yourself with but the object that you use to work through old unresolved issues. New relationships will become replacement parts for old ones.

Work on achieving a healthy sense of identity, self-worth, self-esteem and self-image. The truth is, the cause of our emptiness is not a case of missing persons in our lives, but a case of incompletion in our soul. Everyone must have an "I" before they have a "we."

ACCEPT YOURSELF IN TOTALITY, GIVE YOURSELF FULLY

Too many people attach themselves to another person to obtain approval, affirmation, purpose, safety and identity; and when the inevitable disappointment happens, they complain bitterly that that person failed them. No, you failed yourself. When you come to a relationship lacking personal self-worth, and full of insecurities, all you can offer is neediness. Expecting another person - whether it be a friend, a dating partner, or your husband to provide you with your life is unrealistic and actually unfair. It isn't anyone else's responsibility to give you an identity, make you whole or make you feel good about yourself. People are meant to share in it, not be it.

MOVING FORWARD

I. GET COMFORTABLE WITH THE FACT THAT YOU WILL FEEL VULNERABLE

We often stifle our emotions out of fear, vacillating between the impulse to reveal ourselves, and the impulse to protect ourselves. The result, no one knows the real you.

II. DEVELOP A WISH LIST AND PRAY FOR THE HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS THAT YOU REALLY WANT

A. Establish realistic expectations

B. Do not settle for less

C. Steer away from people who are needy

D. Avoid toxic people and relationships

E. Get your personal power back

III. SPEAK POSITIVE DECLARATIONS

Tell yourself that you will only draw to yourself individuals who are healthy, and who accept you as you are.

IV. GET UP AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT

If you want friends you must first show yourself friendly. Unless we totally accept ourselves we will not be able to establish quality relationships that give us what we want. In order for us to get what we want out of relationships, we need intimacy. But if we shut down, this will never happen. We are waiting for others to change. I have discovered, when I change, everything changes.

INSPIRATIONAL NUGGETS:

"The highest love a person can have for you is to wish for you to grow into the best person you can be. No one owns you, no matter what your relationship." --David Viscott

"Nobody can hurt me without my permission." - Mahatma Ghandi

Here is to celebrating relationships that are real, true and centered in love and inspiring our youth to do the same.
Happy Belated Mother's Day and Happy Sisters' Sanctuary Self-love Day Beautiful People!
Lacey!
Founder/Personal Empowerment Coach

Temple Sancutary by Monisha Garner

2008-05-13T00:52:00.004-04:00

This month in Temple Sanctuary by Monisha Garner, she offers a tip that always helps make the first impression in a face to face relationship run much easier:

To sweeten your mouth and breath add a couple drops of Tea Tree Oil to your toothbrush. This will decrease plaque and works as an antibacterial buster for your gums.

Moya Body Care is about returning back to our natural state, becoming centered beings and maintaining a balance between a healthy lifestyle and genuine wellness. Our mission is to assist in creating a wholistic approach in attaining greatness in life. We offer a combination of Colon Hydrotherapy, Massage Therapy, Yoga and Organic Body Care as well as individualized Wellness
Coaching that is designed to empower and move you to take action. www.moyabodycare.com

Word from Youth

2008-05-06T00:09:00.000-04:00

Please be supportive of our ideas whether it’s something you want us to do or not. When we tell you things we want to do, it’s because we want your support and if your and love support is not there we might give up on our dreams and resent you for not being there.

Anjanae DeCoursey

Imhotep Charter High School

Video of the Month - Girl like Me

2008-04-28T00:33:00.001-04:00

This month's video was submitted by Member Nikki Powerhouse. It is a powerful reminder of what Sisters' Sanctuary is trying to change and an eye-opener for some as to what is being done to ourselves and our children.

Let us know your feelings and thoughts?

Sister's Worth Celebrating - Marissa Arterberry

2008-04-21T00:00:00.000-04:00

Sister's Worth Celebrating is a monthly column by Personal Empowerment Coach, Lacey C. Clark!, of sisters who are giving back to the community and celebrate healing with their work. This month Lacey! interviews Marissa Arterberry, Visual Artist and Author based in Oakland, CA.

Interview by Lacey C. Clark!

1. What makes your heart smile?

So many things! A warm sunny day, a fridge full of fruits and veggies, getting up early in the morning to paint, a good art exhibit, being anywhere near the equator, dance class…there are many aspects of life that make me happy.

2. You are a visual artist, I love the vibrancy of your work. I feel the passion for what you do in the colors you choose. Do you call yourself a visual artist and if so what does that title mean to you?

I do consider myself a visual artist. It means many things. The main thing is, if you really want to know what’s going on with me, where my heart and mind are, take a look at my paintings. I pour a lot of myself into them, and it’s my way of expressing who I am.

3. I wrote a work/book journal called Celebrate HER Now! Where I talk about how self-love is a solution raising the vibration of peace, joy, harmony for communities...Our Young Women of Hip-Hop Generation...Ourselves. What does the term "celebrating myself" mean to you? Have you celebrated yourself? If so how? If not, do you think celebrating yourself is important?

Celebrating ourselves is so important! The main reasons I focused my work on Black women was because I wasn’t seeing enough celebration of who we are and how far we’ve come. I got sick of seeing images of sad, angry, or unloved sisters. And I knew those images were sinking in, because the same things I was seeing in the media, I was seeing on the street. So many of us are happy and whole, but that isn’t the image that gets projected.

I celebrate myself by listening to my heart and doing what I’m called to do. Whether it is to work on a particular painting, go for a walk in nature, or clear old stuff out of my physical/mental space, I listen to myself. We each have our own prescription for happiness and it’s in our hearts. If we take a moment to turn off the tv, radio, etc. and just listen to ourselves, the path of light and beauty is right there in front of us.

4. Do you think it is important for women to celebrate themselves to be better models for our teen girls? Why or why not?

Yes, definitely. Our young women have to understand that happiness is possible and within their reach, and we grownups must lead by example. If your niece/cousin/daughter sees you taking time for yourself, whether it’s prayer time or a bubble bath, sees you loving your body rather than complaining about it, you’re setting a wonderful example. When our girls are brought up by women who celebrate themselves and are fulfilled, they develop positive coping mechanisms. If there’s a problem, they have a way to deal with it that isn’t destructive to their self esteem.

5. Are you connected to teen girls in any way? If so how?

At the moment the only teen girl I’m really connected to is my beautiful niece Haley. She’s fifteen, and is a very dedicated and promising young dancer. It’s amazing to watch her grow into this very smart, capable young woman. Her spirit shines through most when she’s onstage dancing, and the smile never leaves her face! It’s so important for teen girls to have a creative outlet, someplace where they can express their creativity and energy. Because then no matter what happens in life, these young women have something that keeps them rooted within themselves, and reminds them that anything is possible.

6. What was your most challenging experience in your girlhood and how did you over come it or how are you overcoming it?

For me the most challenging experience was accepting myself when no one else did. I grew up in a city with a fairly small Black population, and I just didn’t fit in with the other Black kids at my school. They were listening to Tupac and I was listening to the Beatles. They were wearing Tommy Hilfiger and I got all my clothes at thrift shops. That should have been fine, but I was teased by them constantly. They told me I was trying to be White, that I wasn’t proud of who I was. They just wouldn’t leave me alone. What finally stopped it was when I chopped off my perm and started wearing a close-cropped natural and African clothing. They left me alone after that, I guess I “out-blacked” them, which I found quite hilarious. And when I went away to college in San Francisco, I found an amazing community of more open minded Black folks who accepted me in all my differential splendor. I also began collecting the stories and photos of girls who went through the same thing I did, which I one day hope to publish.

7. Is art healing?

It certainly is. For me it starts with color. I find colors very healing. I dress myself in certain colors, or focus on them in nature for their healing qualities. For instance, red is a very happy and exuberant color, while white is for purification, and green is for healing. The same thing applies to making art. I’ll stand in front of a blank canvas and think, “What am I in need of today? How am I feeling?” And I’ll try to visualize a woman who feels the same way. What does she look like? What kind of setting is she in? What colors is she surrounded by? And by the end, I have a painting of someone who feels the way I do, or who is someone I’m striving to be. It’s very freeing. On a canvas or paper, these women can be who they are, and do anything. And by creating these images, I feel like I can do anything too.

8. What is the most celebratory and most challenging aspect about being a woman?

What I understand about being a woman is that it’s a very powerful thing. We create life! We are very sacred and intuitive beings. We are healers, educators, and we give life balance. And when we’re living life at our highest vibration, wow. There’s so much good we can do. Now that I understand that power, I understand my responsibility to be the best me I can be, because it touches everything and everyone around me. The challenging part is living in a world where a patriarchal system has tried to harness women’s power for the wrong purposes, such as consumer commercialism. We’re taught that if we exploit our bodies for profit or the pleasure of others, that makes us powerful. But it’s just the opposite. It causes us to feel inadequate, it brings us terrible things like sexually transmitted diseases and eating disorders. These are all side effects of women wanting to step into their natural power roles and having that energy channeled in the wrong direction. Just to put it out there, a book that really helped me understand more about the beauty and power of womanhood is Sacred Woman by Queen Afua. I turn to it any time I have a problem.

9. How would you describe yourself in five words?

Sacred. African. Painter. Loving. Woman.

10. How would you describe your ART in three words?

Sacred. African. Women.

11. Tell us about Soulgodess.com. What is your mission with the site?

Well Soulgoddess is my umbrella for everything I do. It started with me painting, writing, selling t-shirts, and soliciting submissions for a book. As my mother would say, I had “too many irons in the fire”. So naturally, everything did okay but didn’t live up to what I’d intended it to be. Focus is an important quality to have in life, and my focus was in too many places. I got burnt out, and I had to sit quietly with myself for a minute. I asked myself, “What would you be doing if you couldn’t do anything else?” And the answer was paint. So I took a step back from everything else to hone my craft and work out some new ideas. That clarity of focus has made a huge difference. I know a lot of folks are looking at me like, “what happened?” But at the end of the day, this is what I’m happiest doing, and I’m confident I’ll come back to the rest. I’m not in a rush anymore.

12. Tell us about one of your favorite piece of work and why it’s your favorite!

It’s very hard to pick a favorite, because each piece represents a different phase of my life’s journey. I’d say the piece that most captures my imagination at the moment is my mixed media portrait of Azmera, the heroine of an epic fairytale I’m working on. She travels backwards through history to heal her people. I like this piece because I took a lot of chances with it. I would sit with it for days or weeks, and let it “breathe” until the next phase of my vision for it appeared. love it because I put a lot of thought into it, and it’s exciting to see this character go from a page in my sketchbook to big, beautiful color!

13. You have upcoming book tell us about that?

The book is tentatively titled, Girlblue: Black Womanhood Reexamined. It was inspired by a conversation between myself and two other “strange” Black girls. We were lamenting about our high school years, how it felt to be an outcast and have no one we could relate to. Someone said, “if only we had all gone to the same school!”

The book was my way of letting girls know that just because they’re different doesn’t mean they’re alone. Where ever they are, they can open this book and see someone just like them, who went through the same thing and came out smiling.

14. What do you want people to walk away with when they encounter your creations?

I would love for everything I create to be the catalyst for change in someone’s life. If someone’s having a bad day or feeling blue, I’d like them to look at something I painted, or wrote, or compiled, and be healed in some way. Or maybe it inspires them to create something of their own, or look at the world differently. With everything I put out, I think the underlying message is, “See? There is another way.” I want folks to feel that, and know they can go out and do anything!

Ashe' Thank You Miss Marissa!

Keep Celebrating Yourself! Keep Celebrating your Art! The world needs you!

Marissa Arterberry is a Visual Artist living in Oakland, California. She has become known for her acid-bright depictions of women of African descent. Marissa graduated from San Francisco State University in 2007 with a B.A. in Painting. She has shown work at the San Jose Jazz Festival, the San Francisco Women’s Building and Stanford University. In her free time, Marissa dedicates herself to African and Brazilian dance, eating lots of fruits and vegetables, and taking long walks. She is always on the lookout for fresh squeezed orange juice.

Her contact is: www.soulgoddess.com
http://www.myspace.com/soulgoddess_art

Temple Sanctuary by Monisha Garner

2008-04-19T11:57:00.004-04:00

Your skin gets plenty of abuse throughout the course of a day, while providing you with your first line of introduction and being the foundation for your physical beauty. We want our skin to hold up through all sorts of events in our lives and it does it's best at all times. Take this month to show your skin some 'Gratitude' for it's faithfulness.

After shower rub a combination of JoJoba Oil and Almond Oil all over your body to keep your skin silky smooth and free of blemishes.

Monisha Garner is the owner of Moya Body Care is about returning back to our natural state, becoming centered beings and maintaining a balance between a healthy lifestyle and genuine wellness. There mission is to assist in creating a wholistic approach in attaining greatness in life. They offer a combination of Colon Hydrotherapy, Massage Therapy, Yoga and Organic Body Care as well as individualized Wellness Coaching that is designed to empower and move you to take action. Visit www.moyabodycare.com

Self-Love Activity For April!

2008-04-13T10:00:00.003-04:00

Create a 'Gratitude List' like the one I just created. Be sure to include all the things that you are thankful for.

For extra fun you can gather your teen girl(s) and each of you can take turns reading as if you are at some Fabulous Award Show.

You can practice this weekly and increase to daily.

We love to see some of the things you are thankful for.
Please post them here!

The Attitude of Gratitude!

2008-04-13T09:30:00.004-04:00

Happy Spring and Happy Self-Love Day Beautiful People!

I have been feeling frustrated lately and I am entitled to my emotions.

I can’t believe it is already April 13, 2008 and certain plans have not materialized like I wanted them to. I realize that when I am frustrated that I am out of balance….fretting over things that mean very little in the larger scheme of things like my hairstyle and photo shoots gone wrong etc. I know that when I am frustrated that I can balance this energy with deep breathing and gratitude. This Self –love day is dedicated to all those people, places and things that I am so very thankful for that make me grateful for being alive.

To the DIVINE for my health, focus, gifts, vision, passion, love, joy and mission. The sun, rain, moon, stars, dirt, flowers, water, clean air, the roots of a tree, honey bees, warm and cool breezes, leaves, sand and sea. The Spring! I love Spring!

Thank You!

I wanted to take the time to pay tribute to my favorite human in the whole wide world, my mother, Dutty, who believed in me %110 ever since I can remember and who allowed me to come back to her home after college to start my company.

Thank YOU!

I wanted to celebrate my spiritual mentor/sister, O, who slowed me down after fretting over not having enough chairs for one of my Tea Party Events and expressed to me that I could do Sisters’ Sanctuary on a rock.

Thank YOU!

To my Dad, Slim, who always has something encouraging and real to say about my mission and my work. I celebrate you DAD!!!!!

Thank YOU!

Miss Nikki Powerhouse who has brought so many thing beautiful things to my life but her pulling out that slightly chilled bottle of Poland Spring water on that hot summer day at that Penn's Landing (Philadelphia, PA) concert truly replenished my soul. YES! I yearned for water and you met that need right on time.

Ashe’ Thank YOU!

To BX in CA whose beautiful, and powerful soul showed up about ten years ago to enable me to access and embrace my truest self.

Thank YOU!

To legendary friend “Beats” Austin who shows up with consistent good, focused, inspirational energy and support. Thanks for keeping me on my toes with your truth and the goodness.

Thank YOU!

To KTBass! for showing up and giving me a business model to follow. I still am very grateful for your presence and inspiration in my life.

Thank YOU!

To my New Sister friend Monique in LA who slowed me down by breathing with me on the phone and assured me that all is well. Her call changed the course of my week!

Ashe’ Thank YOU!

To My Cuz Shanise B. who forwards all of my Sisters’ Sanctuary emails to everyone in her Network, has invested her human capital in my biz and who continues to inspires me through her work with the Akua Projects.

Thank You!

To my Beautiful, Outstanding and Amazing Students, I am your biggest fan! Your blooming nourishes me and gives me the fuel I need to continue to do the work. WATCH OUT WORLD!!!!

Thank YOU!

To Monisha your bath salts (Moya Body Care) make me feel like I am bathing in Heaven… amongst white clouds and warm gold colors. Yes! Yes! Yes! Thanks for calling to check up on me!

Thank YOU!

This is for one of North Philly’s Finest, Devon Allen. The brother with grace and style, and a cup full of goodness that overflows when he celebrates me with some kind of excellence for me and Sisters’ Sanctuary. Your kind is rare …you are truly a Gem!

Thank YOU!

To St. Clair Alphonso Brown, you Affirm what it means to "Make it Happen"! You remember SS when it was a seed in my heart and through your support, knowledge and insight you have helped to make it what it is today and what it will be. I truly appreciate your ear and your hand.

Thank YOU!

To the Legendary Andre Taylor of Taylor Grand aka “Andre For President!” who affirms and promotes my birthright to flourish! Thank you for inspiring the world to WIN. I’m moving Andre! I’m Moving!

Thank YOU!

To “Brother Earl Boyd!” who answer’s my million phone calls when I have a challenge in business. Thank You for having Earth, Wind and Fire on deck to keep your spirits nourished!

Thank YOU!

To Rueben Jones who did a modern dance in his play with no formal dance training. YESS Brotha YES!! Celebrate your Art and be Freeeeeee! Your tenacity inspires me!

Thank YOU!

To that cornbread and strawberry butter, watermelon lemonade with fresh fruit and edible orchids, and that delectable Tilipia entree at Sadiki’s Restaurant in Philadelphia….this meal…um um um…. make me thankful to be alive. It’s like a glorious sunshiny festival dancing on my tongue. YES!

Thank YOU!

To Sadiki of Sadiki’s Restaurant who exudes celebration in stillness and in movement.… Thank you for being a Kindred Spirit. I get lifted in your presence. YES!!

Thank YOU!

To Steve who made his introduction into my life by serenading me with the soulful house song, “Life Starts Today” and continues to present me with R&B renditions from Donnie Hathaway, Anita Baker, Glenn Jones and Aretha Franklin and so many more...that wake me up in the morning and have me jumping for joy through out the day (because I so loooooove music.) YES! YES! YES! YES!

Thank YOU!

I could go on for days. There is sooooo much beauty in my life and I sometimes have to be reminded to slooooooow dooooown to honor and celebrate it! *Takes a deeeeeeeeep breath and exhales slowly* I feel a lot better having wrote that. I wanted to echo the belief that there is so much abundance in the universe. Much, much, much goodness and love! But do we see it? Do we take the time to acknowledge it. Feeeeeel it!? Do we stop to really enjooooooooy it! Sometimes I get out of balance because I am human, but I am grateful for the people, places and things that the Divine has placed in my life to support me through. So this Self-day, let us focus on gratitude and the gifts that it bring. Let us model gratitude for our girls for they need to see women who are grateful for the non- material as well as the material!

Here’s to blooming your seeds of gratitude this Spring!

“Grace isn't a little prayer you chant before receiving a meal. It's a way to live.”

~Jackie Windspear

Lets us support each other in cultivating grace.

Happy Spring and Happy Sisters' Sanctuary Self -Love
Day Beautiful People!

Lacey!
Founder/Personal Empowerment Coach
Sisters' Sanctuary

What are you thankful for?

Lacey! Looooooves:

2008-04-13T09:00:00.006-04:00

- Sadiki's Restaurant in Philadelphia.
- The TV show "Family Reunion" on TV One because its celebrates the ins and outs and ups and downs of family and it reminds me of my family reunion in North Carolina.
- The many beautiful colors of the Spring.
- The story of the Sister who stared the company, "Team Clean" because it is truly inspirational for women who have created or seeking to create their own business.

What do you loooove?

'Fantasy is An Addiction': Nikki Powerhouse Speaks!!!

2008-03-17T09:47:00.004-04:00

Nikki Powerhouse, Philadelphia based actress, playwright, poet, nude figured model and freedom dancer speaks candidly about her upcoming One Woman Play, Fantasy is an Addiction, for Adult Audiences only.

Interview by Lacey C. Clark!

1. What makes your heart smile?

When I wake at 6:00am and witness the sunrise. The sky painted in colors of purple passion, orange bliss and yellow boldness. My heart celebrates the sky’s beauty.

2. We can see that you are definitely a poet, but you are also an actress, how did you come to claim that title for yourself and what does that entail?

Well, honestly it took a long time for me to define myself as an actress. Fear and I had a long running relationship. When it came to my craft, I would deny myself the freedom to just be. To just say I am an actress is not enough for me, this craft takes active work. The active work that will sometimes test me with fear, but I am learning to stop fighting it and push through it. I’ll be the first to tell you it ain’t easy, but I believe to own and embrace who I am takes commitment, patience and willingness to push and thrive through the challenges.

3. Are there any instances where art has saved your life?

Absolutely! The art of freedom dance has saved my life. When I dance to house music, I am able to connect to my truth. It is my chance to live outside of my body and release emotions that restrict me to experiencing life fully. One vocal house song that elevates and inspires me higher is the lyrics of “It’s Alright, I Feel it.” This song has had me many times in the middle of my living room floor, bent over, shouting, chanting, crying and releasing. It reminds me that problems are only a test and they only stay as long as we hold on to them.

4. What does the phrase "celebrate yourself" mean to you? Have you celebrated or do you celebrate yourself? If so, how?

It means I am the most important person in my universe and I deserve to honor who I am. I like to plan "just for me time." It is the time that I give myself the choices to pick an activity to celebrate myself. Sometimes I struggle with taking time out for myself because making me first priority is a new playing field. The world that says NO to others and yes to me seems like I am being selfish, but I am learning that "just for me time" is necessary and I deserve it. Currently, I am planning to see the exhibit of Frida Kahlo at Philadelphia Art Museum. I believe Frida Kahlo paintings depict power, pain, and a healing honesty.

5. Do you think it is important for women to celebrate themselves to be better models for our teen girls? Why or why not?

We must lead by example to express how important it is to celebrate ourselves. When we show our teen girls the beauty in honoring ourselves, they believe us.

6. What was your most challenging experience in your girlhood and how did you overcome it or how are you overcoming it?

During my girlhood, the most challenging experience was dealing with body image and sexuality. I often sexualized my identity to receive love, respect and to feel beautiful inside. From girlhood into adulthood, I dealt with getting my core needs met through having multiple sex partners. The scars of this behavior had me living in secrecy. When I got tired of lying to myself, I asked for help and told my truth. This process has been the most painful because I found myself crying harder and longer for all the things I ran from. As I continue to work on me and work through me, I hope sharing my experiences with women and teen girls will help them to make better choices.

7. What is the most celebratory and most challenging aspect about being a woman?

For me , the most celebratory aspect of being a woman is recognizing that tears are healing and laughter is necessary. The most challenging aspect of being a woman is finding the balance between personal time, work, school, family, and friends.

8.How would you describe yourself in five words?

Unique. Powerful. Nurturer. Talented. Passionate.

9. I'm feeling the title of your upcoming play "Fantasy is an Addiction." Why this title and what does it mean?

I gave the play this title because it best described the main characters hunt to escape her reality. It basically means fantasy is a drug when it is used as an escape to deal with deep rooted issues.

10. Tell me about your play? Why is it important for women to understand it contents?

Through a collage of vignettes, Tina, a sex worker, discovers her passion for eroticism is not what it seems. By way of a series of recollections and reenactments, we discover, along with the main character, the root of her fantasy. Striking symbolism and powerful prose provide these characters and the audience a pathway to healing.
It is important for women to understand the content of this play because too often we use sex as a way to meet our core needs. We seek to be loved and respected by sexualizing our behavior.

11 Did you write it?
Yes.

12. Not only are your an actress, you are also a playwright. What is that process like?

The process is grueling. It takes me through one extreme to the next. During the process, I am constantly trying to find the balance between freedom and fear. On one hand as I write, the story wants to tell the truth, but the fear of vulnerability and judgment challenges me every step of the way.

13. I understand, that you have taught theater to youth, what advice would you give to mothers and mentors raising teen girls today?

Our teen girls need us and we need them. In the process in helping our teen girls, we help ourselves. When we tell them our truth, our teen girls will mirror the same. I believe it is necessary to remember when we were teens as we raise our girls. The tools we needed to survive are the same our teen girls needs. They need positive affirmation, support, and a safe outlet to tell their truth.

I want to truly thank you for sharing your truth with the world on our blog. I know it ain't easy being open, but thank you for your courage. You are beautiful Miss Legendary Powerhouse :). I celebrate you!

I celebrate you Ms. Clark!

Thank You :) Any final thoughts?

Live, Love and Laugh out Loud!

Nikki Powerhouse is a native of Philadelphia, PA soil. An actress, playwright, poet, nude figured model and freedom dancer are many of her artistic expressions. She began her extensive theater training at the Philadelphia Creative Performing Arts High School, and continued her theater passion at Black Nexxus, Theatre for New Generation, and many theater classes in New York City. Her New York City stage credits includes: Notice Me presented in NYC Fringe Festival, Sex, God, and Heels, Queen Mary of Scotland and Khepera. In Philadelphia she has trained with The New Freedom Theater, and currently in her second year at Community College of Philadelphia and will finish her BFA at Temple University School of Theater Communications. Philadelphia stage credits includes: her one-woman show Fantasy is an Addiction (2005 Philly Fringe Festival), lead role in Antigone, Seven Guitars, Fences, and Merry Wives of Windsor. Ms. Powerhouse's flexibility leaves her audiences captivated by each every performance giving true mean to the name: Powerhouse!

Fantasy is an Addiction
Through a collage of vignettes, Tina, a sex worker, discovers her passion for eroticism is not what it seems. By way of a series of recollections and reenactments, we discover, along with the main character, the root of her fantasy. Striking symbolism and powerful prose provide these characters and the audience a pathway to healing.

Co sponsored by

Sisters' Sanctuary(TM)

and

Valray Productions

The contents of this play is recommended for
Adult Audiences Only.

Saturday, March 29, 2008
3:00pm (Sharp)
In Celebration of Women’s Month
African American Museum
701 Arch Street
Philadelphia, PA
Cost- $15 non-members and $7 members

To contact Nikki Powerhouse:
http://www.myspace.com/nicoletray

Nikki Loves

2008-03-15T20:47:00.003-04:00

Deep Afro-soul house music
Freedom Dancing to Jembe drums
Writing at nighttime

What Do You Love?

Nikki Powerhouse is an actress, playwright, poet, nude figured model and freedom dancer. She began her extensive theater training at the Philadelphia Creative Performing Arts high school, and continued her theater passion at Black Nexxus, Theatre for New Generation, and many varies theater classes in New York City. Nikki has an upcoming one-woman play sponsored by Sisters' Sanctuary:

Fantasy is an Addiction

***Parental Advisory notice.*** Rated-R

March 29, 2008

Showtime @ 3:00pm

In Celebration of Women’s Month

African American Museum

701 Arch Street

Philadelphia, PA

Cost- $15 non-members and $7 members

Temple Sanctuary by Monisha Garner

2008-03-14T21:34:00.000-04:00

It’s easy to let yourself go when there is a lot on your plate, but here is a quick idea to pay some attention to yourself:

Start with your hands. By keeping the skin moisturizered, you keep your skin healthy and find time to show yourself some love. Use a richer moisturizer as the weather cools, or lighter if it is becoming warmer.

Big But Do We Really Feeeel Beautiful!

2008-03-13T21:25:00.000-04:00

Happy Self-love Day Beautiful People!

I weigh 200+ pounds.

I have been bigger than what the doctor says I should be for the most part of my life (Their standards are European and I am not.)

Except for that period of time in college when I lost a significant amount of weight when I was prompted to exercise three times a week for physical therapy. When I lost the weight, I could shop at an average shop for women. I mean I liked the feeling …it was easy to just go to rack and pick up a size 10 or 12 and keep it moving. But at a size 18 I feel the difference in my energy level in my ability to conquer steps like I used. Don’t get me wrong if you ever see me on the dance floor, you’d think I was I size two. I live in my body and I am not afraid to move it and not just in a sexual way but in a way that says this is me and I AM HERE! You should see my friend Nikki; she is more fluid than I am. I guess this is why I am confused by the BBW (Big Beautiful Women) movement also known as Fat Pride. While I live to see people celebrate themselves, and I want people to feel beautiful from the inside out, something about heavy breathing, fearing steps, and chasing toxic foods full of cholesterol, grease and sugar don’t really seem to celebratory to me.

I was watching a video about a sister who seemed a bit angry because Queen Latifah is now the spokesperson for Jenny Craig as if she sold the BBW community out. I am also truly alarmed by the number of 300lb+women poppin' droppin' and lockin' it and taking it off for the camera on You Tube. Just search BBW on You Tube and you will see what I mean. Historically, greasy and sugary food has been used as a pacifier to sooth our pain, just think of all the repasses you been to. What do we serve? Are we passing around fruit or fudge cake? What would you say if your grand mom gave you an apple instead of an apple pie? I am writing to say , that food and sugar is also an addiction, a way to numb our pain and if we are to truly practice self-love it’s about asking ourselves from a health and spiritual perspective, am I really happy with this weight or have I just learned to tolerate it? When I lay down at night am I really happy with how I feel? Is my attending the BBW conference really pride or place I feel like I belong? Because I do understand that the human spirit needs belonging and kinship.

A true and real question I ‘d like to ask that beautiful sister in Lane Bryant who waddled over to me breathing heavily and who took about three minutes to fold up my clothes is, do you feel like you are thriving or just surviving? Do you feel you are worthy vitality and optimal health? Because at 200+ I feel beautiful, I love being me but I am working on being lighter, not for fashion and image reasons but because life force energy is a beautiful thing, detoxification is a beautiful thing, walking up 5 flights of steps without feeling you’re your heart will explode is a beautiful thing. I deserve that.

Quite frankly when I look at the pictures of me as a size 10, I looked too skinny. But I liked being able to jump up and down on the bed. I still do it now but with more caution. J

When we put the bull horn down, and take off the skinny verses fat mask, when we stop operating in defense mode, when no one is watching, how do we really feel? Is high blood pressure, cholesterol, diabetes, back and knee pain celebratory to you?

All in all, I am wishing us the freedom to be real with ourselves to tell the truth to ourselves even when it hurts. I am praying for our freedom to love our bodies no matter the size but also praying for our courage to know when it’s time to make a change, to know when we are worthy of more. Not through YO YO dieting via Dexatrim, or Appemine or for fitting in a smaller bathing suit but to save or develop the quality of our lives. Our girls are watching.

Happy Self love Day Beautiful People!

Lacey C. Clark!

Founder/Personal Empowerment Coach

Lacey! Loves

2008-03-13T21:14:00.003-04:00

Yerba Mate Herbal Tea

The recent Philadelphia production of Ain't Misbehavin'

Aleisha Vaughn

The Independent Film Channel

Dj- Louie Vega

The movie -I Am Legend

What do you love?

Lacey C. Clark!, an expert in solving the communications challenges between young and older women of color. Her work includes creating the self-love movement and holiday , The Self-Love Celebration Series for female youth of Hip-Hop Generation, The Sisters' Sanctuary Inner Beau-Tea Parties, the workbook/journal, Celebrate HER Now! and the 5 Disc Audio collection, Healing the Gap. Lacey!'s clients include individuals, families, not-for profits, civic organizations and corporations. Lacey's insights heal wounds and bridge the gap created by our changing culture. She has shared stages and platforms with, Jill Scott, Hill Harper, Dr. Sonia Sanchez, Les Brown, and Dr. Robin Smith of the Oprah Winfrey show. Lacey!'s approach has been featured in both local and national media.

Self-Love Tip of the Month

2008-03-13T13:00:00.004-04:00

Before you go to bed at night ask yourself, am I happy? If not, what do I NEED to achieve balance, joy and peace of mind? Continue asking yourself the same question until you are blessed with an answer. With patience, it will come.

Happy Self-love Day Beautiful People!

2008-02-20T21:16:00.001-05:00

February 13th, 2008 ·

Welcome to the Sisters' Sanctuary experience, aka our new blog.

This blog has replaced the our Monthly Self- love Letter (newsletter.) I hope you enjoyed your 13 Days of Self-love and have had a beautiful time celebrating yourself. I wanted to take this time to really define self-love and self-worth and why I think it is imperative to the survival of our young women.

Sisters' Sanctuary defines self-love as the practice of knowing your worth and value and seeing yourself as sacred and beautiful being. Self-Worth is about knowing how to create boundaries, knowing what is healthy and productive in your life. Self-love is about being able to nurture, honor and care for yourself to raise the vibration and energy of joy, goodness and peace. For so long we have been taught that we as women of African Descent were inferior, that our natural hair, skin color, shape and size were less than beautiful, less than human.

I do this self-love work for the spirit of:

Margaret Garner, the subject of the movie Beloved, who had to survive the horrors of slavery only to make a decision to kill her children before she would allow them to live a life of mental and physical bondage.

Saarjite Baartman, a young South African woman who's nude body was displayed in a cage as public spectacle in a Circus in Europe, because of her enlarged buttocks.

The "strong black woman" who has not made time to feel, because her true hurt, pain, sorrow and disappointment would overwhelm her.

But most of all I do this for the little sisters whose minds are over saturated with images and lyrics that tell her only value is how good she looks in a thong. The little sisters with the over developed bodies who have been groped, sexually assaulted, gaulked at, molested, "bitched", "hoed", smacked, flipped, and labeled "super head".

I do this for the sister who sexes to get love, because like Halle Balle in Monsters Ball she is looking for something and someone to "make her feel good " from the years of subconsciously absorbing her mothers', grandmothers' and great grandmothers' pain.

This is a sanctuary for you to be human, for you to safe enough to know healing, celebrating, valuing and loving yourself was your birth right whole time. This is your place to know that you are worthy of kind words, truth, love, peace, harmony, support, community, celebration, kinship, leadership, feeling, dancing barefoot, singing in the nude, laughing until your stomach hurts, your cry being heard, divorcing mediocrity and marrying excellence. This is a place for the buck toothed sister, the 350lb sister, the Muslim sister, the Buddist, the Christian sister, the sister who was born to or chooses to love other women, the skinny sister, the sister whose skin color is black as coal, the sister who was called Casper all her life, the dwarf sister, the handicap sister, the deaf sister, the six figure sister, the celebrity who has lost her ground, the executive, the one with the short hair the sister with long hair, the sister who works at the supermarket, the one who had the mastectomy, the unemployed sister, and the phone sex operator. This is for you, because you are our childrens' models. They are watching you, they are modeling you and no matter who you are you deserve to be whole, full and celebrated.

Happy Self-Love Day
Beautiful People!
Lacey!

SISTERS' SANCTUARY

Lacey Loves

Self-Love Day Activity

Happy Self-Love Day

Video Pick of the Month - Zora Howard - Biracial Hair

Sisters' Sanctuary Sponsored Event

Happy Sisters' Sanctuary Self-Love Day

Self - Love Activity

Lacey! Loves

Word from The Youth

Sisters' Worth Celebrating - July 2008 - The Black Women's Art Festival

Video Pick of the Month

Happy SELF-LOVE DAY BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!

Sel-Love Day ACTIVITY!

Lacey Loooves:

Word From Our Youth

Earth & Women Documentary

Statement of Black Men Against the Exploitation of Black Women

Happy Self-Love Day Activity !

HAPPY SELF-LOVE DAY BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!

Temple Sanctuary by Monisha Garner of Moya Body Care

Lacey! Loooooooves:

Word From Our Youth

Video of the Month - "A Powerful Noise"

Sister's Worth Celebrating - May 2008

Self-love Day Activity:

Lacey LooooOoOOOooves:

Belonging is HUMAN Need!

I. GET COMFORTABLE WITH THE FACT THAT YOU WILL FEEL VULNERABLE

II. DEVELOP A WISH LIST AND PRAY FOR THE HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS THAT YOU REALLY WANT

III. SPEAK POSITIVE DECLARATIONSTell yourself that you will only draw to yourself individuals who are healthy, and who accept you as you are.

IV. GET UP AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT

Temple Sancutary by Monisha Garner

Word from Youth

Video of the Month - Girl like Me

Sister's Worth Celebrating - Marissa Arterberry

Temple Sanctuary by Monisha Garner

Self-Love Activity For April!

The Attitude of Gratitude!

Lacey! Looooooves:

'Fantasy is An Addiction': Nikki Powerhouse Speaks!!!

Nikki Loves

Temple Sanctuary by Monisha Garner

Big But Do We Really Feeeel Beautiful!

Lacey! Loves

Self-Love Tip of the Month

Happy Self-love Day Beautiful People!

February 13th, 2008 ·

III. SPEAK POSITIVE DECLARATIONS

Tell yourself that you will only draw to yourself individuals who are healthy, and who accept you as you are.