Lacey Loves

-clothes dried in the sunshine

-knowing that my physical, emotional and spirtual needs are worthy of being met

-the art of clarity (getting rid of vaguness)

-recyclying

Self-Love Day Activity

Self-Love Day Activity:

What fears have been holding you back?

What judgements and toxic beliefs do you carry?

What can you do to add pure love to the situation or thought ?

Commit to doing that thing today. Right now!

Happy Self-Love Day

Greeting Beautiful People!

Will you turn your Divine Spark into a flame on this Self-love love day? In this life time?

The Divine Spark

n Divine Humanity believes that each and every person has an immortal ʽsparkʼ within them. This is oursacred self.

n This starlight that we have within us needs to be awaken, to grow and to be brought to the surface and nourished until its radiance suffuses the world.

n In so doing our relationship to ourselves and to all other things of the world is transformed from being based on fear to being based on love.

New Consciousness

n Life is not about ʽsinʼ or ʽguilt.ʼ

n Life is about Awakening.

n Awakening to a new consciousness that the divine is in all things, all things have consciousness and that we are divine human beings born in love and in goodness.

n This transformation of consciousness from a sinful human being to a divine human being is essential for the well-being of humanity and the earth.

Rev. Dr. JC Husfelt and Rev. Sherry Husfelt

of http://www.divinehumanity.com

This Self-love Day let us celebrate and ignite our Divine Sparks and inspire our youth to do the same.

Happy Self-love Day Beautiful People!

Lacey!

Personal Empowerment Coach

Sisters' Sanctuary

Video Pick of the Month - Zora Howard - Biracial Hair

Sisters' Sanctuary Sponsored Event

Philly Stand UP! in LA! 215 LA!

Calling ALL PHILADELPHIANS!!!
It has been a long time coming and now we have arrived. We all came from the City of Brotherly Love to the City of Angels for one reason or another. Some of our original focuses have shifted to other goals and some of us are on the same path. It is time for us all to meet and create an epicenter of Family and Community of Philadelphians.

WE WELCOME YOU TO 215LA!

Faruq Jenkins, Lacey C. Clark! of (www.sisterssanctuary.com) & Nana
Location: The House of Nana
11445 Stagg Street, North Hollywood, CA 91605-2620 US

When: Saturday, September 13, 2:00PM
Phone: 323-445-2565

Our mission is to pool all of our resources to support each others endeavors, artistic and otherwise, by developing a collective network of togetherness in an effort to help the visions of its members manifest into a reality.

• Are you teaching a class?

• Fundraising for a project?

• Performing Live?

• Do you need a babysitter?

• Do you need a ride to the airport?

Fun stuff too...Bowling Night, Pot Luck Dinners, and Basketball Games when the 76ers are in town! Possibilities are endless. LET US COMMUNE!!!

Please spread the word to all Philly people in your circle and beyond by forwarding this invite.

Happy Sisters' Sanctuary Self-Love Day

Hello Beautiful People!
How are you? Happy Sisters' Sanctuary Self-love Day!
I wanted to share this message of personal empowerment for this month's self-love day! Enjoy!

Be Proactive: We’re all born dependent and experience years of solid effort at getting us to do what others want us to do. Most still carry a mental map which puts them below the powerful and truly capable “other people” of our real or =0 A fantasy lives. The habits of self-acceptance and listening to our internal drummers are hard to develop, but critical for full living. Self-confidence is where it all starts. It’s not an “act”— but it is a “decision” which one can make and struggle to live with. Self-confidence comes from experience at taking risks to try things out, and giving yourself some credit for doing so.Self-confidence comes from abolishing guilt, putting fear on the shelf, and telling yourself every moment of your life that you are o.k. It comes from habits of listening to, and going with, one’s heart and desire, rather than being 0D cowed by the fears which one can always apply to circumstances. When things could go either way, Winners get in the habit of describing the glass as ‘half full’ rather than ‘half empty’. by Steve Iman excerpt from: Personal Growth http://www.csupomona.edu/~sciman/steve/articles/essaysonggowth.pdf

Here's to truly accepting and honoring you and inspiring our youth to do the same!
Happy Self-Love Day Beautiful People!

Lacey!
Personal Empowerment Coach/Founder
Sisters' Sanctuary

Self - Love Activity

Practice developing your intuition. We have all have it. Sit in quiet without t.v. radio or computer.
Ask a question, take deep breaths and listen for the answer. Repeat until the answer feels right in your spirit or center of peace.

Lacey! Loves

Lacey! Loves:

-Trees...the varied shapes and sizes.

-Salmon pate' and caviar on an omelet.

-Making Friends

-DA (Debtors Anonymous) (Please do a google search)

-Cashing checks

-Avocado

-People who ask, "How are you doing?" and really care to hear the true answer.

Word from The Youth

1. Tell us the truth, and give us room to live! We want advice, and what better guidance to give then from true experiences from our parents, who we hope have our greatest interest at heart.

Anjanae DeCoursey

Imhotep Charter High School

01/09/07

Sisters' Worth Celebrating - July 2008 - The Black Women's Art Festival

The Black Women’s Arts Festival (BWAF) was founded and produced in March 2003 by Founder and Former Director Cassendre Xavier. Xavier produced a 3-day event, which showcased the work of black women artists in: performance, visual arts, literary arts, and film. Now in its fifth year BWAF has become a non-profit which produces a once-yearly 4-day festival which showcases: Music/Live Performance, Literary Arts, Visual Arts, Film/Video, Workshops, and Dance/Theater and hosts over 60 artists from across the globe. BWAF is committed to being a platform that values black women and their work; emphasizing unique, under-represented art forms, showcasing new and emerging artists while promoting the necessity of health and well-being. Led by Creative Director Monica McIntyre, BWAF is poised to become a world-renowned arts festival. Sisters' Sanctuary was able to have a brief Q & A with BWAF Creative Director, Monica McIntyre.

• What is BWAF?

BWAF is the Black Women's Arts Festival, an annual festival and non-profit organization. It's a Philadelphia based community event which focuses on the visibility and viability of black women artists of all genres and media without regard for: age, gender expression, physical ability, religion, sexual orientation or size. BWAF is a 501(c)3 organization.

• When was BWAF started? Who are the founders of BWAF?

The Black Women's Arts Festival was founded in March 2003 by Cassendre Xavier and began as a 3-day one-time event.

• Where is BWAF located?

Our festival, as of BWAF 2007, takes place in multiple locations. Our venues for this year are: First Unitarian Church, The Rotunda, Kaffa Crossing, Vivant Art Collection, The Metropolitan Bakery & Cafe, Sanctuary, and World Cafe Live.

• Why was BWAF started?

Cassendre Xavier created the Black Women's Arts Festival in response to a lack of visible and viable black female artists; she knew they existed and made an opportunity to feature their talent.

• Why are you apart of BWAF?

I first became involved with the Black Women's Arts Festival in 2003 as a performer and recognized the beauty and inspiration that this event gave me. I just knew this event had to keep happening and was given the opportunity to curate it in 2004 and have since been heavily involved in its organizing and production. This is such an important and necessary event for our community and the world at large and I am compelled to stay involved.

• What is the membership of BWAF made up of? (For example, type of people, their location, etc.)

At present the Black Women's Arts Festival doesn't have membership.

• Do BWAF have any upcoming events? Tell us about this event? (for example, purpose, location, date, time, price, etc.)

We are preparing for our 5th Annual Black Women's Arts Festival happening July 31st-August 3rd, 2008 in Philadelphia, PA. For more information, complete schedule, pricing, and discounted tickets go to: www.bwafphilly.org or call 215.951.0330 ext 2108.

• Tell us about the past participates?

We have been blessed to have some amazing performers grace the Black Women's Arts Festival. Our past years have featured: Sparlha Swa, RhapsodE, Davina Stewart, Walidha Imarisha, Olu Butterfly, Ryva Parker, and Voice of Africa, to name a few.

• How does this event encourage teen girls? How does BWAF look to affect the lives of teen girls?

By honoring black women artists we send a positive message to young women about their importance as people, females, and artists. Seeing the wide range of talent that is presented by our festival: dance, theater, visual arts, literary arts, films, and workshops; helps to expand their perceptions of what women can and are able to do.






Photos In Order of Appearances: Creative Director, Monica McIntrye; Founder, Cassendre Xavier; 2007 Featured Artist, Keisha Hutchins; 2007 Featured Artist, Nedra Johnson; 2004,2005 & 2007 Featured Artist, Marcia McIntyre; 2003 & 2005 Featured Artist, GHETTOSONGBIRD; 2007 Featured Artist, Sparlha Swa.

Video Pick of the Month

This video is dedicated to all the sisters who are in pain. Unresolved hurt in girlhood evolves into more unresolved pain in womanhood. Please know that healing, peace and beauty is possible.
I love you.

Lacey!

Happy SELF-LOVE DAY BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!

Greeting Beautiful PEOPLE!
Happy JULY Sisters' Sanctuary SELF-LOVE DAY!

I wanted to share some inspirational nuggets that will carry you through the month. Please share with as many people as you can!


"Lack of self-worth is the fundamental source of all emotional pain. A feeling of insecurity, unworthiness and lack of value is the core experience of powerlessness."~ Gary Zukav & Linda Francis - from "The Heart Of The Soul" ~





Self-love is priceless!
Be inspired to create healthy models for our youth.
Model self-love!

Happy Self-love Day Beautiful People!
Lacey !
Personal Empowerment Coach and Founder
Sisters' Sanctuary

Sel-Love Day ACTIVITY!

Refer 5-10 people to this blog to watch the posted video and discuss the relevance of the posted quote.

Lacey Loooves:

• The design and the summer events at the Ford Ampitheater in Los Angeles.
  
  The grounds, gardens and view of the hill and mountains from the Getty Museum.
  
  Mya aka “My-My” the medium burnt orange colored dog because she is so sweet.
  
  A freshly laundered, big, fluffy and white comforter because it makes me feel like I am wrapped in a soft cloud.
  

Trader Joes! Because they have inexpensive, high quality, and gourmet health food.

Creating and being part of community because it reminds me that people need each other for support, understanding and love. Isolation is a dream killer.

The Spa Soiree presented by VIBE HOLISTIC. Free high quality spa services… (I got the Rain Drop Therapy and reflexology )and a free buffet of health food with coconut water and cashew juice. YUM! It was delectable! Loved every second of it! Another one is coming up in Sept in LA and in 09 in NY.

What do you looooove?

Word From Our Youth

1. Does abuse equal love? If it doesn’t comments like “I’m beating you because I love you” imply that. Personally I’m not a supporter of beatings.

Anjanae DeCoursey

Imhotep Charter High School

01/09/07

Earth & Women Documentary

New Vision was Associate Producer and Director of Photography. This project ended up being the pilot for a series about caring for Mother Earth & Nature by utilizing Sustainable Living. Producer, Lyndol Michael - Differentia Films www.media-theater.com and it was picked up by a distributor in USA.

Statement of Black Men Against the Exploitation of Black Women

*Statement of Black Men Against the Exploitation of Black Women*

Six years have gone by since we first heard the allegations that R. Kelly had filmed himself having sex with an underage girl. During that time we have seen the videotape being hawked on street corners in Black communities, as if the dehumanization of one of our own was not at stake. We have seen entertainers rally around him and watched his career reach new heights despite the grave possibility that he had molested and urinated on a 13-year old girl. We saw African Americans purchase millions of his records despite the long history of such charges swirling around the singer. Worst of all, we have witnessed the sad vision of Black people cheering his acquittal with a fervor usually reserved for community heroes and shaken our heads at the stunning lack of outrage over the verdict in the broader Black community.

Over these years, justice has been delayed and it has been denied. Perhaps a jury can accept R. Kelly's absurd defense and find "reasonable doubt" despite the fact that the film was shot in his home and featured a man who was identical to him. Perhaps they doubted that the young woman in the courtroom was, in fact, the same person featured in the ten year old video. But there is no doubt about this: some young Black woman was filmed being degraded and exploited by a much older Black man, some daughter of our community was left unprotected, and somewhere another Black woman is being molested, abused or raped and our callous handling of this case will make it that much more difficult for her to come forward and be believed. And each of us is responsible for it.

We have proudly seen the community take to the streets in defense of Black men who have been the victims of police violence or racist attacks, but that righteous outrage only highlights the silence surrounding this verdict.

We believe that our judgment has been clouded by celebrity-worship; we believe that we are a community in crisis and that our addiction to sexism has reached such an extreme that many of us cannot even recognize child molestation when we see it.

We recognize the absolute necessity for Black men to speak in a single, unified voice and state something that should be absolutely obvious: that the women of our community are full human beings, that we cannot and will not tolerate the poisonous hatred of women that has already damaged our families, relationships and culture.

We believe that our daughters are precious and they deserve our protection. We believe that Black men must take responsibility for our contributions to this terrible state of affairs and make an effort to change our lives and our communities.

This is about more than R. Kelly's claims to innocence. *It is about our survival as a community*. Until we believe that our daughters, sisters, mothers, wives and friends are worthy of justice, until we believe that rape, domestic violence and the casual sexism that permeates our culture are absolutely unacceptable, until we recognize that the first priority of any community is the protection of its young, we will remain in this tragic dead-end.

We ask that you:

o Sign your name if you are a Black male who supports this statement:

http://www.petitiononline.com/rkelly/petition.html

o Forward this statement to your entire network and ask other Black males to sign as well

o Make a personal pledge to never support R. Kelly again in any form or fashion, unless he publicly apologizes for his behavior and gets help for his long-standing sexual conduct, in his private life and in his music

o Make a commitment in your own life to never to hit, beat, molest, rape, or exploit Black females in any way and, if you have, to take ownership for your behavior, seek emotional and spiritual help, and, over time, become a voice against all forms of Black female exploitation

o Challenge other Black males, no matter their age, class or educational background, or status in life, if they engage in behavior and language that is exploitative and or disrespectful to Black females in any way. If you say nothing, you become just as guilty.

o Learn to listen to the voices, concerns, needs, criticisms, and challenges of Black females, because they are our equals, and because in listening we will learn a new and different kind of Black manhood


We support the work of scholars, activists and organizations that are helping to redefine Black manhood in healthy ways. Additional resources are listed below.

Books:
Who's Gonna Take the Weight, Kevin Powell
New Black Man, Mark Anthony Neal
Deals with the Devil and Other Reasons to Riot, Pearl Cleage
Traps: African American Men on Gender and Sexuality, Rudolph Byrd and Beverly Guy-Sheftall

Films:
I Am A Man: Black Masculinity in America, by Byron Hurt
Hip Hop: Beyond Beats and Rhymes, by Byron Hurt
NO! The Rape Documentary, by Aishah Simmons

Organizations
The 2025 Campaign: www.2025bmb.org <http://www.2025bmb.org>
Men Stopping Violence: www.menstoppingviolence.org <http://www.menstoppingviolence.org>

Happy Self-Love Day Activity !

Take a few moments to ask yourself what the Self-Love Day message mean to you.

What does it mean to you?

I invite you to leave a comment so we can all share in the reflection.

Peace and Greatness,
Lacey C. Clark!

HAPPY SELF-LOVE DAY BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!

Greeting Beautiful People!

Happy June Self -Love Day! YEAAAAAAAAH!
I came across this quote...it vibrated with my spirit and I wanted to share it with you as the theme of this month's Self-love Day:

"Hearts are blocked by attachment. The heart is a radiant energy and we block it from flowing out. If we let if flow peace, love and joy would become real. " -Sian

Here's to being in the DIVINE flow with our cups overflowing with peace, love and joy and inspiring our youth to do the same.

Happy Self-love Day Beautiful People!
Lacey!
Personal Empowerment/ Self Esteem Coach!
Founder
Sisters' Sanctuary

Temple Sanctuary by Monisha Garner of Moya Body Care

• Apply a light Yoga and Breathing routine in the morning before you start your day. You will have increased blood circulation and oxygen throughout the body which enhances skin tone, keeps eyes bright and clear and promotes a healthy mental outlook.

Moya Body Care is about returning back to our natural state, becoming centered beings and maintaining a balance between a healthy lifestyle and genuine wellness. Our mission is to assist in creating a wholistic approach in attaining greatness in life. We offer a combination of Colon Hydrotherapy, Massage Therapy, Yoga and Organic Body Care as well as individualized Wellness Coaching that is designed to empower and move you to take action.

Website Link: www.moyabodycare.com
Email: monisha_garner@yahoo.com

Lacey! Loooooooves:

• Hanging out with Monique and Z(he's so beautiful, he's only 1.5 years), Monisha and Ksands. Monique, Z and I went to a non denominational church and during one of the musical selections, I was overwhelmed with joy and vulnerability that I began to cry. As soon as the tears fell he began to rub me in comfort. The DIVINE speaks through the youth. Are we listening? I just met Z(two weeks ago)... but he is so intuitive. He was 95 percent quiet the whole service..imagine that.

• Kiting on the beach at sunset.

• Jumping and laughing uncontrollably in a bounce house (the kind at amusement parks).

• My friend, "Beats".

• The time spent with Michael in Long Beach,CA...so effortless and beautiful! Thank you.

• Grilled fish.

• Leslie Odom - because he exudes grace, greatness and an artistic brilliance and I am filled to the brim in his presence. Here is Leslie singing, Try a Little Tenderness.

What do you looooooOOve?

Word From Our Youth

1. Name calling is disrespectful, words like “ho”, “bitch”, and “slut” hurt us. Approach us with encouraging words like, “beautiful”, “smart”, and “sacred” when talking to us. To find out more ways to handle difficult situations see “Celebrate HER Now!” An Interactive Guide to Loving Ourselves and Embracing Female Youth of The Hip-Hop Generation, By Lacey C. Clark!

Anjanae DeCoursey

Imhotep Charter High School

01/09/07

Video of the Month - "A Powerful Noise"

An official selection of the 2008 Tribeca Film Festival, this inspiring documentary follows three extraordinary women -- in Bosnia-Herzegovina, Mali and Vietnam -- as they overcome barriers to lead day-to-day battles against ignorance, poverty, oppression, and ethnic strife. Visit www.apowerfulnoise.org to learn more.







Executive Producer Sheila Johnson talks about "A Powerful Noise" on Fox Business News.







At the Tribeca Film Festival in New York, viewers discuss the new documentary "A Powerful Noise."

Sister's Worth Celebrating - May 2008

Good Day Everyone,

I am your blog manager, Shanny. I will be formally introducing myself later this month.

This month in Sister's Worth Celebrating, I could not settle on one Sister. So, I am going to talk about a few and I want you all to share your thoughts. I also want you all to tell us about a Sister or Sisters you think are worth celebrating. The Sisters I have chosen are Mary McLeod Bethune, Mary Mahoney, The Square Rootz, Priscilla Maddox & Joan Reid.

Mary McLeod Bethune was African-American teacher who, with only $1.50, began a school to help educate young African-American women. Sister Mary McLeod Bethune has inspired all of us to sisterhood and protecting our younger sisters. She also has shown us it does not take alot to start. I feel Sister Bethune's spirit throughout Sisters' Sanctuary, which is why I am a supporter. I am confident Sister Bethune would too.

Mary Mahoney was the first African American woman to study and work as a professionally trained nurse. Mahoney received her diploma from the New England Hospital in 1879, one of only four of 18 to pass the difficult course. So to all of those who are nurses and aspiring nurses, this is one of the Sister that paved they way for you. If you have a young lady that has shown interest in nursing make sure she knows who this woman is.

These next Sisters are a personal inspiration to me. I say personal, because they are running the type of business I am building at the moment. When I started researching Kitchen Co-ops, I found there were none in my area. I widen my area search and found an article entitled, 'Can’t Stand the Heat? Then Rent the Kitchen' by Joseph P. Fried from the New York Times. In his articles, he spotlights Priscilla Maddox & Joan Reid, the owners of Kitchen For Hire in Brooklyn. I was inspired by how these ladies well into retirement, decided to venture out onto something new. They shared a lot of information that helped me with what I needed to know about my business venture. I have recently had the opportunity to reach out to them an learn more. I celebrate these Sisters because they were not afraid to try and fail. We need to encourage ourselves, each other and our younger Sisters NOT TO BE AFRAID TO TRY AND FAIL.

Last, but not least The Square Rootz. I had the pleasure of interviewing these Sisters for my magazine. These young vibrate ladies bring color and inspiration to their movement. The present members are New Yorker native Kat Noel, Brooklyn born Boston raise Philly transplant Marly Pierre-Louis and West Coast native Brooklyn transplant Jessica Jones. The have dubbed themselves the official street beaters. These Sisters aim to bring the African Diaspora together through event and media. These Sisters are also very active in their communities. The Square Rootz have formed to be another artery in the positive push for our young Sisters.

These Sisters have made a great impression on my life past, present and future. I only hope to be able to repay them, by making them same sort of impression in other Sisters' lives and paying my represents to them whenever I have the chance. In the upcoming months, I will be presenting more in depth spotlights on these women. Come back and learn more and be inspired more.

Mary McLeod Bethune
Mary Eliza Mahoney, R.N.
Kitchen For Hire
The Square Rootz



Who is the Sister You Celebrate? What does she do? Where is she from? When did you start to celebrate her? Why do you celebrate her? How do you celebrate her inspiration in your daily life?




Shanny aka Shanise B. is the creator/owner of The Akua Projects & Designs By ASH. She is a Philadelphia native and a life long activist for Sisterhood within the African Diaspora. Shanny became a supporter of Sisters' Sanctuary in 2006 and an active part of Sisters' Sanctuary in 2007. Shanny is a lover of creation and creative people. Shanny aspires to open her first brick and mortar business in 2009.

Self-love Day Activity:

Examine the quality of your relationships. Is there an ebb and flow? Do you give as well as receive? Is there balance? Ask yourself, is this relationship based on love or fear? If it is based on fear, how can I give more love to myself to attract a more love-centered relationship in my life?

Lacey LooooOoOOOooves:

-Celebrating Mother's Day with her legendary motha!

-Learning tennis from a lil' fabulous 8 year African-American girl...potential to be the next Venus and Serena!

-Being in the DIVINE flow.

-Hanging out with people who enjoy, celebrate and honor life without drugs or alcohol.

-Somewhere Here on Earth- New Release by Prince.

-Agave-sweetener from a cactus plant that taste like a light version of honey and maple syrup.

-Watercolors XM Radio- Art for your Ears! YES! YES!

-Sadiki! Sadiki! Sadiki!

-Her Artsy Friends.

Belonging is HUMAN Need!

Happy Self-Love Day Beautiful People!

I received this message via email and I wanted to share this message as the theme of this month's Self-Love Day! The author of this article is unknown.

Relationships: Longing for Belonging

FROM THE WORD: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." - l Corinthians 13:4-8 The question arises, "What is it that really makes people happy?" The answer is: Quality Relationships. The reason why I know this to be true is that so many people run from relationship to relationship looking for the elusive components of a good friendship or the ideal husband or wife. We are born with an insatiable inner need for meaningful interaction with others. The following information will help you to understand and deal with difficult people and personalities. Take men and women for example. Men are more interested in feeling that they are capable to perform a task or a duty. Women are more interested in acceptance. What we look for in relationships, and what every one needs to experience is: Feeling Accepted Feeling Celebrated Feeling Connected Feeling Understood Feeling Wanted and Needed Feeling Appreciated Feeling Enjoyed Feeling Significant When those elements of "feelings" are not present, we feel as if we do not belong. Then our love languages may be different from the people with whom we are trying to connect. If people are not communicating in our love language, this can cause isolation and an intense feeling of aloneness. According to Gary Chapman in his book entitled , The Five Love Languages, they are: Words of Affirmation Quality Time Receiving Gifts Acts of Services Physical Touch The first thing you have to work on is your integrity, pulling all the parts of you together and embracing yourself as a total person. This involves accepting your personality, disposition, uniqueness, your past and your present. You will never have true intimacy until you are truly intimate with yourself.

GET TO KNOW THE REAL YOU Take the masks off and explore everything you have suppressed over the course of your life. Accept and move toward resolving unresolved issues and healing any residue of past pain and disappointments. Remember every relationship, in a sense, gives you another chance to resolve issues you didn't get squared away in a previous one. But if you do not heal your hurts, you'll never get them squared away. You'll just continue to repeat relational problems and replay your pain again and again. And when this pattern develops you'll have created a much bigger problem. You will no longer relate to people, but only to what they represent. They will not be anyone you will share yourself with but the object that you use to work through old unresolved issues. New relationships will become replacement parts for old ones. Work on achieving a healthy sense of identity, self-worth, self-esteem and self-image. The truth is, the cause of our emptiness is not a case of missing persons in our lives, but a case of incompletion in our soul. Everyone must have an "I" before they have a "we." ACCEPT YOURSELF IN TOTALITY, GIVE YOURSELF FULLY Too many people attach themselves to another person to obtain approval, affirmation, purpose, safety and identity; and when the inevitable disappointment happens, they complain bitterly that that person failed them. No, you failed yourself. When you come to a relationship lacking personal self-worth, and full of insecurities, all you can offer is neediness. Expecting another person - whether it be a friend, a dating partner, or your husband to provide you with your life is unrealistic and actually unfair. It isn't anyone else's responsibility to give you an identity, make you whole or make you feel good about yourself. People are meant to share in it, not be it.

MOVING FORWARD

I. GET COMFORTABLE WITH THE FACT THAT YOU WILL FEEL VULNERABLE

We often stifle our emotions out of fear, vacillating between the impulse to reveal ourselves, and the impulse to protect ourselves. The result, no one knows the real you.

II. DEVELOP A WISH LIST AND PRAY FOR THE HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS THAT YOU REALLY WANT

A. Establish realistic expectations

B. Do not settle for less

C. Steer away from people who are needy

D. Avoid toxic people and relationships

E. Get your personal power back

III. SPEAK POSITIVE DECLARATIONS

Tell yourself that you will only draw to yourself individuals who are healthy, and who accept you as you are.

IV. GET UP AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT

If you want friends you must first show yourself friendly. Unless we totally accept ourselves we will not be able to establish quality relationships that give us what we want. In order for us to get what we want out of relationships, we need intimacy. But if we shut down, this will never happen. We are waiting for others to change. I have discovered, when I change, everything changes.

INSPIRATIONAL NUGGETS:

"The highest love a person can have for you is to wish for you to grow into the best person you can be. No one owns you, no matter what your relationship." --David Viscott

"Nobody can hurt me without my permission." - Mahatma Ghandi

Here is to celebrating relationships that are real, true and centered in love and inspiring our youth to do the same.
Happy Belated Mother's Day and Happy Sisters' Sanctuary Self-love Day Beautiful People!
Lacey!
Founder/Personal Empowerment Coach

Temple Sancutary by Monisha Garner

This month in Temple Sanctuary by Monisha Garner, she offers a tip that always helps make the first impression in a face to face relationship run much easier:

• To sweeten your mouth and breath add a couple drops of Tea Tree Oil to your toothbrush. This will decrease plaque and works as an antibacterial buster for your gums.

Moya Body Care is about returning back to our natural state, becoming centered beings and maintaining a balance between a healthy lifestyle and genuine wellness. Our mission is to assist in creating a wholistic approach in attaining greatness in life. We offer a combination of Colon Hydrotherapy, Massage Therapy, Yoga and Organic Body Care as well as individualized Wellness
Coaching that is designed to empower and move you to take action. www.moyabodycare.com

Word from Youth

1. Please be supportive of our ideas whether it’s something you want us to do or not. When we tell you things we want to do, it’s because we want your support and if your and love support is not there we might give up on our dreams and resent you for not being there.

Anjanae DeCoursey

Imhotep Charter High School

Video of the Month - Girl like Me

This month's video was submitted by Member Nikki Powerhouse. It is a powerful reminder of what Sisters' Sanctuary is trying to change and an eye-opener for some as to what is being done to ourselves and our children.

Let us know your feelings and thoughts?

Sister's Worth Celebrating - Marissa Arterberry

Sister's Worth Celebrating is a monthly column by Personal Empowerment Coach, Lacey C. Clark!, of sisters who are giving back to the community and celebrate healing with their work. This month Lacey! interviews Marissa Arterberry, Visual Artist and Author based in Oakland, CA.

Interview by Lacey C. Clark!

1. What makes your heart smile?

So many things! A warm sunny day, a fridge full of fruits and veggies, getting up early in the morning to paint, a good art exhibit, being anywhere near the equator, dance class…there are many aspects of life that make me happy.

2. You are a visual artist, I love the vibrancy of your work. I feel the passion for what you do in the colors you choose. Do you call yourself a visual artist and if so what does that title mean to you?

I do consider myself a visual artist. It means many things. The main thing is, if you really want to know what’s going on with me, where my heart and mind are, take a look at my paintings. I pour a lot of myself into them, and it’s my way of expressing who I am.

3. I wrote a work/book journal called Celebrate HER Now! Where I talk about how self-love is a solution raising the vibration of peace, joy, harmony for communities...Our Young Women of Hip-Hop Generation...Ourselves. What does the term "celebrating myself" mean to you? Have you celebrated yourself? If so how? If not, do you think celebrating yourself is important?

Celebrating ourselves is so important! The main reasons I focused my work on Black women was because I wasn’t seeing enough celebration of who we are and how far we’ve come. I got sick of seeing images of sad, angry, or unloved sisters. And I knew those images were sinking in, because the same things I was seeing in the media, I was seeing on the street. So many of us are happy and whole, but that isn’t the image that gets projected.

I celebrate myself by listening to my heart and doing what I’m called to do. Whether it is to work on a particular painting, go for a walk in nature, or clear old stuff out of my physical/mental space, I listen to myself. We each have our own prescription for happiness and it’s in our hearts. If we take a moment to turn off the tv, radio, etc. and just listen to ourselves, the path of light and beauty is right there in front of us.

4. Do you think it is important for women to celebrate themselves to be better models for our teen girls? Why or why not?

Yes, definitely. Our young women have to understand that happiness is possible and within their reach, and we grownups must lead by example. If your niece/cousin/daughter sees you taking time for yourself, whether it’s prayer time or a bubble bath, sees you loving your body rather than complaining about it, you’re setting a wonderful example. When our girls are brought up by women who celebrate themselves and are fulfilled, they develop positive coping mechanisms. If there’s a problem, they have a way to deal with it that isn’t destructive to their self esteem.

5. Are you connected to teen girls in any way? If so how?

At the moment the only teen girl I’m really connected to is my beautiful niece Haley. She’s fifteen, and is a very dedicated and promising young dancer. It’s amazing to watch her grow into this very smart, capable young woman. Her spirit shines through most when she’s onstage dancing, and the smile never leaves her face! It’s so important for teen girls to have a creative outlet, someplace where they can express their creativity and energy. Because then no matter what happens in life, these young women have something that keeps them rooted within themselves, and reminds them that anything is possible.

6. What was your most challenging experience in your girlhood and how did you over come it or how are you overcoming it?

For me the most challenging experience was accepting myself when no one else did. I grew up in a city with a fairly small Black population, and I just didn’t fit in with the other Black kids at my school. They were listening to Tupac and I was listening to the Beatles. They were wearing Tommy Hilfiger and I got all my clothes at thrift shops. That should have been fine, but I was teased by them constantly. They told me I was trying to be White, that I wasn’t proud of who I was. They just wouldn’t leave me alone. What finally stopped it was when I chopped off my perm and started wearing a close-cropped natural and African clothing. They left me alone after that, I guess I “out-blacked” them, which I found quite hilarious. And when I went away to college in San Francisco, I found an amazing community of more open minded Black folks who accepted me in all my differential splendor. I also began collecting the stories and photos of girls who went through the same thing I did, which I one day hope to publish.

7. Is art healing?

It certainly is. For me it starts with color. I find colors very healing. I dress myself in certain colors, or focus on them in nature for their healing qualities. For instance, red is a very happy and exuberant color, while white is for purification, and green is for healing. The same thing applies to making art. I’ll stand in front of a blank canvas and think, “What am I in need of today? How am I feeling?” And I’ll try to visualize a woman who feels the same way. What does she look like? What kind of setting is she in? What colors is she surrounded by? And by the end, I have a painting of someone who feels the way I do, or who is someone I’m striving to be. It’s very freeing. On a canvas or paper, these women can be who they are, and do anything. And by creating these images, I feel like I can do anything too.

8. What is the most celebratory and most challenging aspect about being a woman?

What I understand about being a woman is that it’s a very powerful thing. We create life! We are very sacred and intuitive beings. We are healers, educators, and we give life balance. And when we’re living life at our highest vibration, wow. There’s so much good we can do. Now that I understand that power, I understand my responsibility to be the best me I can be, because it touches everything and everyone around me. The challenging part is living in a world where a patriarchal system has tried to harness women’s power for the wrong purposes, such as consumer commercialism. We’re taught that if we exploit our bodies for profit or the pleasure of others, that makes us powerful. But it’s just the opposite. It causes us to feel inadequate, it brings us terrible things like sexually transmitted diseases and eating disorders. These are all side effects of women wanting to step into their natural power roles and having that energy channeled in the wrong direction. Just to put it out there, a book that really helped me understand more about the beauty and power of womanhood is Sacred Woman by Queen Afua. I turn to it any time I have a problem.

9. How would you describe yourself in five words?

Sacred. African. Painter. Loving. Woman.

10. How would you describe your ART in three words?

Sacred. African. Women.

11. Tell us about Soulgodess.com. What is your mission with the site?

Well Soulgoddess is my umbrella for everything I do. It started with me painting, writing, selling t-shirts, and soliciting submissions for a book. As my mother would say, I had “too many irons in the fire”. So naturally, everything did okay but didn’t live up to what I’d intended it to be. Focus is an important quality to have in life, and my focus was in too many places. I got burnt out, and I had to sit quietly with myself for a minute. I asked myself, “What would you be doing if you couldn’t do anything else?” And the answer was paint. So I took a step back from everything else to hone my craft and work out some new ideas. That clarity of focus has made a huge difference. I know a lot of folks are looking at me like, “what happened?” But at the end of the day, this is what I’m happiest doing, and I’m confident I’ll come back to the rest. I’m not in a rush anymore.

12. Tell us about one of your favorite piece of work and why it’s your favorite!

It’s very hard to pick a favorite, because each piece represents a different phase of my life’s journey. I’d say the piece that most captures my imagination at the moment is my mixed media portrait of Azmera, the heroine of an epic fairytale I’m working on. She travels backwards through history to heal her people. I like this piece because I took a lot of chances with it. I would sit with it for days or weeks, and let it “breathe” until the next phase of my vision for it appeared. love it because I put a lot of thought into it, and it’s exciting to see this character go from a page in my sketchbook to big, beautiful color!

13. You have upcoming book tell us about that?

The book is tentatively titled, Girlblue: Black Womanhood Reexamined. It was inspired by a conversation between myself and two other “strange” Black girls. We were lamenting about our high school years, how it felt to be an outcast and have no one we could relate to. Someone said, “if only we had all gone to the same school!”

The book was my way of letting girls know that just because they’re different doesn’t mean they’re alone. Where ever they are, they can open this book and see someone just like them, who went through the same thing and came out smiling.

14. What do you want people to walk away with when they encounter your creations?

I would love for everything I create to be the catalyst for change in someone’s life. If someone’s having a bad day or feeling blue, I’d like them to look at something I painted, or wrote, or compiled, and be healed in some way. Or maybe it inspires them to create something of their own, or look at the world differently. With everything I put out, I think the underlying message is, “See? There is another way.” I want folks to feel that, and know they can go out and do anything!

Ashe' Thank You Miss Marissa!

Keep Celebrating Yourself! Keep Celebrating your Art! The world needs you!

Marissa Arterberry is a Visual Artist living in Oakland, California. She has become known for her acid-bright depictions of women of African descent. Marissa graduated from San Francisco State University in 2007 with a B.A. in Painting. She has shown work at the San Jose Jazz Festival, the San Francisco Women’s Building and Stanford University. In her free time, Marissa dedicates herself to African and Brazilian dance, eating lots of fruits and vegetables, and taking long walks. She is always on the lookout for fresh squeezed orange juice.

Her contact is: www.soulgoddess.com
http://www.myspace.com/soulgoddess_art